But I CONSTANTLY have a live squirrel in my pants

What kind of disease are you?

Deeblite:

Deeblite is caused by monkeys.

Deeblite complex makes you think you’re important. You aren’t.
To cure Deeblite infection, keep a live squirrel in your underpants for a week.

Name?

What kind of disease are you?

Bob Zygala:

Bob Zygala is caused by Satan.

To cure Bob Zygala, write bad goth poetry.

Name?